A happy money marriage is a key ingredient to a happy marriage. We all want a live happily ever after with the person of our dreams. The intention is to spend the rest of our lives together. But the sad reality is that 70% – 80% of relationships that break up, blame money.
So, if you want a happy money marriage you need to talk about money and deal with money as a couple.
Here are a few tips for a happy money marriage.
Communicate about money
If you’re not sure how to get started, our blog New relationships: The Money Conversation has some tips that you help you through. Before you get married or even get too far down the relationship track you need to have open and honest conversations about money, your personal financial position (yes that includes your debt). If you can’t compromise and find common ground before you even get married you are certainly going to struggle afterwards.
It can be very frustrating for you both when one of you wants to talk about money and the other one isn’t so keen. If that’s the case, our blog, Let’s Talk About Money Honey has some great tips that you help you both through this.
Have a shared vision for your relationship
We don’t just mean financial, this is about your life together; what you want to do, where you want to go, what you want to achieve together as a couple. Yes, the children conversation is part of this if you haven’t already had it.
Have joint goals, both short and long term
When you were in the early phase of your relationship you probably talked about the dreams that you had, the travel you wanted to do and maybe own your home. It is now time to get serious about turning those dreams into goals together and working towards them. You don’t want to walk up in 20 years time and realise they have all slipped through your fingers.
The ‘B’ word
Budgets can work but most of us fail at making them work. We (Money Mentalist) prefer a Money Plan. If you have goals you want to achieve, a money plan isn’t that hard to implement as you clearly know why you are making the changes and monitoring your spending. A money plan isn’t about frugality or depriving yourself of the things you love, it is about making Choices, “If I choose this now, can I still have that later?”
Have a look at a short video we made on the Money Plan, it’s part of a series called ‘Why We do Dumb Stuff ‘. Technically it’s called Behavioural Economics but that sounded a little dry!
It is quite possible you and your spouse have completely different views about spending, saving and debt. If you do, don’t worry, these differences can become a strength rather than a weakness. Understand what it is like to be in each other’s shoes, how they see the world and by utilising open honest communication you can make it work. If you’re not sure what your Money Personality is, take our Money Personality quiz, you might be surprised!
Make sure you can pay for the wedding
Unfortunately, we know a few couples who didn’t have a happy money marriage and it was all over before the wedding was even paid for. Planning your dream wedding is really exciting, but you don’t want to be paying for it for the first 5 years of your marriage and putting unnecessary stress on yourselves.
Joint or separate finances
That is a whole blog topic by itself, so watch this space for more on that.
Don’t end up a statistic. Just like the any relationship, having a happy money marriage takes work, but the results are amazing.
If you feel that your marriage isn’t quite as money happy as you like it to be, or you would like to know more about our coaching and mentoring programmes, drop us line and we’ll be more than happy to answer your questions.